Rootless Tree
by Queerologist
Summary: After seeing a glimpse of Regina's inner pain, Emma takes it onto herself to help the hostile woman.  But when heart and mind battle against one another the two women are forced to acknowledge their feelings; a notion that could break Regina entirely.
1. Chapter One

**Chapter One:**  
>"<em>What I want from you is empty your head.<em>"

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><p>Green eyes watched in a daze as white clouds of whipped cream danced around the cup of hot cocoa gracefully. The pale puffs created an abstract picture against the dark liquid, but the woman's vacant gaze looked right through the delicious art as she chewed on her bottom lip distractedly. Sighing silently, the woman dipped a slender finger inside the cup, mindlessly twirling the digit within the sweet beverage. Her mind was heavy with lead thoughts that weighed uncomfortably on her cerebrum; the defenseless woman couldn't seem to detach herself from the warring fugue. But, as her finger scooped up an unaffected chunk of cream and lifted it to her mouth, a small voice rescued her from her brain's incessant wanderings.<p>

"Emma…?" Henry questioned curiously, his dark brows furrowing inquisitively, "you alright?"

"Huh?" the blonde murmured in confusion as she licked the sweet cream off her finger, her pale eyes slowly beginning to focus back to reality.

"I asked if you were okay," the boy began, rolling his eyes in jest, "you've been acting weird ever since mom stopped spying on us…"

Emma shifted nervously on the stool she was sitting on at the mention of Henry's adopted mother. It was true, ever since the dark woman had left their presence in the kitchen the blonde's mind began to race at an incredible speed. The mayor always seemed to make her nervous, and no matter how smoothly she threw back an insult, or how confidently she walked away, on the inside Emma was shaking. This strange feeling always occurred whenever she was around the older woman, and yet, tonight when Regina had finally granted her alone time with her son, she couldn't help but to feel hesitant and cautious; as if the mayor had ulterior motives when she decided to leave them alone with their cocoa. Motionlessly shaking away the crowded thoughts in her mind, Emma looked over at Henry and gave him a gentle, yet tight, smile.

"Nah, kid, I'm fine."

"Good." Henry nodded, smiling widely before taking a large gulp of his drink, "but, anyway…"

"Hey, Henry, where is your mom anyway?"

Before the words had even completely left the confines of her mouth Emma regretted it. This was her time with her son, with Henry, this time meant more to her than the world. And yet, for some unknown reason she couldn't seem to get the thoughts of Regina out of her mind. There was something suspicious going on, and the blonde would not be able to be comfortable and alert until she found out what that thing was. Bracing herself, she sheepishly looked back over to the boy, his brows furrowed once more.

"My mom?" he questioned unevenly, narrowing his eyes a bit, "what does she have to do with anything?"

"Don't you find it weird," Emma began, shifting the weight of her body so that she was leaning against the hard surface of the island, closer to Henry, "that your mom randomly decided not to stay in the room tonight?" Pursing her lips, the blonde instinctively squared her shoulders as she continued. "Something is not right here."

"I don't know, Emma…" Henry said nervously, fingering the handle on his cup, "it might be about the curse…we don't wanna mess with it."

"You might be right…"

Although she knew she was playing far too much into Henry's notion of fairytale characters inhabiting Storybrooke, she knew it made him happy, so she continued to cater to his imagination, even if it was "crazy" at times. But, Emma knew that she had to do something or else her visit with her son would be nothing short of him discussing "operation cobra" and her continuing to stare aimlessly into her hot chocolate. No, the blonde was going to investigate, whether Henry agreed with it or not.

"Look, Henry, I really don't feel good about this," Emma began, sliding off her stool and pulling on her leather jacket, "I think I'm gonna go look for your mom."

"But, Emma…" the boy pleaded, grabbing onto her coat as she walked past him, stopping her in her tracks, "we have things to talk about…" after looking around quickly to make sure the coast was clear he continued in a hushed tone, "…operation cobra…"

"I'll be back in five minutes, kid, I promise," the blonde swore, squeezing Henry's thin shoulders for emphasis, "and then we can talk about operation cobra, alright?"

Henry said nothing, but nodded in agreement, and the blonde flashed him a small smile while she crossed the kitchen. When she reached the door that led into the back hallway of the house Emma stopped her movements. Maybe this was a bad idea; maybe she should listen to her son and spend the rest of her allotted time with him instead of venturing off in search of the missing mayor. Perhaps his reasoning for her staying—the curse—was obviously untrue, but the boy could be right about it not being a good idea to look into the mayor's private affairs. Chewing on the inside of her cheek with indecision, the blonde finally decided that if the dark woman were up to something then it was best that Emma found out, and so she quickly looked over at Henry and left the kitchen.

Once in the back hallway of the house, the blonde wasn't entirely sure what she should be looking for, but what she did know was that Regina had left the kitchen in this direction, so she must be close by. After several moments of peeking behind closed doors, and listening intently Emma's ministrations stopped. As she stood beside the door that led to the backyard the blonde could hear soft, muffled noises. Raising a light eyebrow in question, Emma quietly opened the door and stepped outside into the cool night air. What she saw made her heart stop and her breath catch in her throat.

The mayor stood outside in the darkness beneath her apple tree, one hand pressed tightly against the rough bark and the other covering her mouth to muffle her sobs; she was crying. The blonde was taken aback, and for a moment she thought that she should run back inside to Henry to continue their time together. Not only did she feel stupid for wanting to investigate something that didn't have a motive, but she felt terrible for thinking that this woman, this human woman was so evil that every single thing she did was to hurt others, when in actuality she was severely hurting.

Emma bit her lip roughly as she combed her fingers through her hair unsure of what to do, but at the same time frozen in place; the sight of a woman with so much power and authority seeming so small and vulnerable made the blonde's stomach twist in sickening knots. As the nausea tugged within her abdomen, Emma slowly began to back up, trying to quietly enter the house before Regina noted her presence. But, before she made it inside, her boot caught against the door frame and made a loud, resounding 'thump'. Cursing under her breath, the blonde tried to clamber inside without the mayor noticing, but she was stopped by a sharp, surprised gasp. Green eyes widened in fear as she realized she was on the verge of getting caught, but still, her legs refused to budge and she looked toward the mayor akin to a deer in headlights.

"Henry?" Regina asked in a cracked voice, her face continuing to face the tree as she tried frantically to erase the evidence of her tears.

"Err…" the blonde shook her head, what was going on with her tonight? Although it was true that she always felt inevitably inferior to the mayor, she could usually form a coherent sentence, but it seemed like everything was turning on its head this evening. "No, it's, Emma."

The second her words flittered into the night air, the brunette quickly spun around, her black eyes glaring at Emma with a fiery darkness. The blonde felt her body begin to tense under the scrutiny of the older woman's gaze, but she set her jaw and pressed her hands against her hips; if she couldn't be fearless on the inside she would like to at least seem unfazed on the outside.

"Ms. Swan," the brunette hissed, walking purposefully closer to the younger woman, "shouldn't you be inside with my son?"

"Maybe I needed to talk to you, Madame Mayor?" Emma asked coolly as she folded her arms across her chest, her eyes watching Regina quickly approach and invade her personal space.

"Or maybe you were spying on me?" The brunette seethed, leaning in towards the blonde until her bosom nearly brushed against the younger woman's arms. "In fact, you're rather well known for that type of uncouth behavior."

Hostility was a common trait that Regina exhibited daily, and yet the sheriff had seen that tenderness hidden beneath the invisible armor of coldness. When Emma had came outside she had seen that weakness; that dark sadness tightly wrapped around the dark woman. And in that moment something snapped within her, her entire outlook on the brunette had changed. This woman—Regina—wasn't evil; she was merely a broken down person who tried to ease the pain by inflicting pain among others. Although this wasn't an admirable trait, it was one that Emma could understand; pity began to tangle in her heart strings for the mayor.

"I heard you, Regina…"

It was nearly a whisper, if the brunette hadn't been paying such close attention to every movement the sheriff made, she could have easily brushed it off as an agitated sigh, or a heavy breath. But, Regina had heard what she said, and although her mind did not entirely fathom Emma's confession, she felt herself step away self-consciously, worrying fingers lifting to her cheek to check for moistness. Thoughts pressed against the back of the mayor's eyes and she begged herself not to release the tension in the form of tears. She did not need to deal with this woman seeing her crumble; she didn't want anyone to see her break—that was her greatest fear of all. And as she felt a silent, shaking breath escape her burning lungs, the brunette turned away from the woman pointedly and walked briskly toward her tree, letting her fingers caress the cold, smooth skin of a perfectly crimson apple.

"You heard what, Ms. Swan?"

"You…" Emma started, cautiously walking toward the formidable woman until she stood a mere foot away, "I heard you…crying."

"That's absurd!" Regina scoffed, spinning around to meet the soft gaze of green eyes. The gentleness that the blonde emanated stirred something within her, but she violently pushed it away as she crossed her arms over her chest, unconsciously closing herself to the curious sheriff. "I was merely tending to my tree and I…"

"Do you always need to be so hard?" Emma questioned in frustration, damning herself internally; she could easily just let it be, and yet something inside her wanted to talk to this woman; wanted to know why she was so broken. "You're human, just like the rest of us, and although you'd be hard pressed to show it you do have feelings, Madame Mayor. Maybe you should try showing them every once in a while?"

For the second time that evening, Regina was caught off guard and she literally stumbled backward until her spine gently pressed against the rough bark of the apple tree. Black eyes widened in a look akin to awe, and she felt her lips part gently as her heart fluttered softly within her chest. The brunette knew that she should not have let the emotions get the better of her while she watched her son fawn over the distasteful blonde; knew that she shouldn't have let her thoughts wander back to a time when everything became tarnished and sullen. But, for the first time in a long time she couldn't contain her emotions, and she let the evil, angry mask fall away until she was a mere pile of nerves and tears. Regina thought that her secret vulnerability would be safe as long as she remained in the one place she felt home: the apple tree, and yet she had been found by the one person in the world that she wished hadn't seen her this way. Mulling over what to do, she couldn't think of anything to say; shell-shocked and frightened that she would completely break-down in front of the sheriff, she dug her fingernails into the bare flesh of her arms roughly, and forced herself to speak.

"I'm a rootless tree…" the brunette whispered, letting her black eyes flutter shut when the tears began to burn behind her eyes, "…a part of the scenery but not connected to anything; no roots, no ties…"

As the intimate words tumbled from her lips, Regina wished that she could gather them from the air and force them back down her throat before Emma heard them. But, at the same time, she also felt a lightness gather in her chest from releasing such ominous thoughts for the first time in a very, very long time. Her mind swam in the quiet stillness of her brain and she nearly let herself smile as she felt her soul hum in contentment. When she finally opened her eyes she was staring directly into glassy emeralds; the blonde was standing directly in front of her separated by only a few inches. The brunette felt the warmth of Emma's body against her own and she shivered. Perhaps it was because it was an emotionally jarring evening, or that she was merely chilled but in the back of her mind the brunette knew that it was simply because she wasn't use to such closeness. Not physical closeness, but mental, emotional closeness—she had not experienced that in decades, and it left her feeling raw and frightened.

Tears prickled behind her eyes as Emma watched the storm of emotions wreck havoc within the mayor's lithe frame. After listening to a short, concise sentence the blonde felt as though the older woman was reading her very soul. Above anything else Emma knew what it felt like to be pressed into an existence, into a life that was merely a holding device. It wasn't anything permanent; just a short stop until you moved onto the next one. Being thrown from foster home to foster home created children like that; one's that never fully understood what it felt like to be a part of something, to be eternally connected to another person or place. It was one of the worst feelings in the world, and Emma knew that notion well. It clawed violently inside her everyday like a demonic monster trying to destroy her from the inside, and now she finally understood why Regina was the way she was, why she was always so angry and hateful. In that moment the blonde understood the mayor entirely.

She chewed on her lip frantically as her eyes continued to water, for once in her life she had met someone who truly understood her inner turmoil, someone who knew exactly what was going on inside her head and it was the one woman that she could not stand. Emma almost laughed at the irony of it all: her greatest enemy being someone that could easily resonate with every pain that pulsed within her heart. And as those thoughts fluttered within her mind, the blonde never noticed as her arm slowly lifted, her fingers gently wrapping around Regina's hand. When she felt the contact of skin against her palm she looked down in shock as she saw her fingers intertwined with the brunette's, and more to her surprise she realized that the mayor was making no attempt to detach her hand from the soft grasp.

Regina gasped when she felt cold fingers wrap around her's, and although a large part of her brain's voice was screaming at her to pull away; that the woman who was consoling her should not be trusted…deep down there was a small whisper from her heart that told her to hold on, and she did. For several moments they merely stayed there, beneath the apple tree in silence with their hands interwoven, holding onto each other as desperately as they could. A blanket of softness and reassurance guarded them as they let their vulnerabilities show, and both of them could not seem to step away from the warmth that it created within them. But, just as quickly as the tender, breathtaking moment had begun, it was lost upon them as a soft voice caressed their ears from across the yard.

"Emma?"

Henry slowly emerged from the house and out into the backyard, his eyes narrowing at the sight of the two women standing in the darkness. Once she heard her son's voice, the brunette roughly pulled her hand away from Emma's and quickly walked over towards the curious boy. The blonde was shell-shocked and she blearily turned around and watched as Regina strode away from her, as if everything that had happened was a mere illusion that painted itself within the sheriff's mind. Shaking her head, she numbly walked over to Henry and the mayor, her eyes distant and dazed once again, except this time it was due to an ultimately different reason.

"Henry, go inside and get ready for bed, it's getting late."

"But, mom…"

"But nothing, Henry," Regina scolded gently, "go upstairs and brush your teeth, and then you can see Ms. Swan to the door."

Frowning sullenly, the small boy nodded and scuffed his shoes across the grass as he reentered the large house. The two women looked after him in silence as he raced through the house turning every light on as he went. Emma smiled at his precociousness and shoved her hands into her pockets idly. When the house settled from Henry's running around, the blonde let her gaze wander over to the woman standing beside her, and for the first time she realized just how beautiful she was. Her brows furrowed as the thought echoed in her mind; they had shared one emotional moment together and now she was becoming soft, this was not a good thing. When Emma finally pulled herself back into reality she noticed that the mayor was looking at her softly, as if she too were in a daze. But before the blonde could emblazon the lovely expression on the dark woman's face into her memory, it was removed and replaced with one of annoyance and frustration.

"Ms. Swan, are you going to stare at me all night or are you going to say goodnight to Henry?"

"I…" the sheriff shook her head slightly, put off by the harshness in the woman's tone when only moments ago she had seen the beautiful, natural side of her, "uh…are you going to be alright?"

"My emotions are none of your concern, Ms. Swan," Regina said pointedly, motioning for the blonde to follow her into the house. They quickly walked through the back hallway, into the kitchen and out towards the main entrance in an awkward silence. When they finally reached the door, the brunette turned to Emma, a grave look creasing her features. "It's nearly eight o'clock, you best say goodbye to Henry and leave…"

"Regina…"

"Ms. Swan…" the brunette held a dangerously warning tone to her voice, and she glared at the sheriff with reddened, glossy eyes, "…this is not up for discussion."

Henry bounded down the stairs donning a pair of flannel pajamas and a wide smile. The wounded look on Emma's face was quickly replaced with a warm smile as she reached out and ruffled the young boy's hair playfully. The boy spoke quickly and aimlessly about their next get together and the blonde tried to pay full attention, but couldn't help but to sneak glances at Regina from time to time. After several moments of discussion, the brunette told Henry to go upstairs to bed, and that he could speak to the sheriff later. The boy huffed, said his goodbyes and stomped up the stairs.

"Now," the mayor sighed, opening the door and basically pushing the blonde from the premises with her gaze, "have a good evening, Ms. Swan."

Nodding in defeat, Emma walked out the door and nearly jumped as she heard it slam shut behind her. Turning around, she looked at the door with a pained expression on her face; how could she be so stupid as to believe that one moment of weakness would make Regina and her suddenly become less hostile toward one another? Shaking her head she realized that what she thought happened must have been a lot less meaningful to the brunette than to her, and she sighed as she walked down the path towards her car. Nothing would ever change between the two women, and the blonde merely had to learn to accept that.

When she reached the beat up, yellow buggy she looked up into the soft glow of lit rooms and her eyes instantly met Regina's. The mayor was standing, staring out her bedroom window. The two women held each other's gaze for what felt like an eternity, and as the dark haired woman turned away and closed the curtains Emma felt her right hand tingle; the same hand that moments ago held Regina's. Looking down at the shaking palm, she realized that no matter how much the stubborn woman denied it, she and the blonde had created a deep connection that night, and the sheriff was going to do everything in her power to help the dark woman to see that, and to feel that.

With the curtains closed, and the reassuring sound of Emma's car sputtering to life, Regina let herself collapse onto her bed. Salty tears licked at her eyes in earnest, and she clenched them shut as she balled her hands into tightly wound fists. But, slowly, she let her eyes flutter open, tears gently spilling from the dark depths, as she gazed at her left hand defiantly. It was a traitor; it had melded into the bittersweet touch that the blonde had offered in a manic, overzealous manner. If she weren't so vain, Regina may have cut the betraying hand off, and yet as her thoughts wandered she felt the hand press tenderly against her fluttering heart. Sparkling white teeth bit at crimson lips as she felt her body battle against itself; her mind shrieking at her to not give into temptation of feelings as her heart sobbed for the beauteous love and understanding that it felt she so deserved. Nothing was making sense to the brunette; nothing aside from that fact that when Emma has attempted to reach out to her, tried to comfort her, she had felt her soul quiver and burst from its constraining chains—coming back to life. But no matter how delicious it felt to have these thoughts and emotions flooding throughout her again, Regina knew above all that she could not succumb, that she would not fall to her knees in weakness. For if she did, the brunette knew that her happiness—her curse—could quickly be obliviated.

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><p><strong>AN: This is INTENDED to be a short (couple of chapters) story, something to work my way into the epic Swan Queen tale that I have been working on strenuously. This story isn't much, and I'm sure that my writing certainly needs heaps of work, but bear with me, I'm trying, haha. Regardless, if you liked this chapter, and want to read more, leave me a review. If not, I'll leave this story in the dust and solely work on my other pieces. Also, this story was loosely inspired by the song 'Rootless Tree' by Damien Rice, you should check it out! :)**


	2. Chapter Two

**Chapter Two**  
><em>They say be true, don't stain your bed<em>

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><p>A bundle of white roses and an open bottle of red wine dangled from slender fingers as a dark woman stumbled through the ominous cemetery. Pausing for a moment, the woman lifted the bottle to her lips and let the warm liquor pour down her throat. It burned its way down to her stomach and she rolled her eyes in satisfaction as she felt the delicious sensation of heat coursing through her veins. The alcohol seemed to numb the inexplicable pain she was feeling, but it could not erase the thoughts that were pressing against her mind constantly. Pulling the bottle away from her reddened mouth in frustration she wiped the tart moisture from her lips with the sleeve of her coat and looked up at the stars.<p>

Tilting her head upward was a bad idea as her lithe frame began to sway from the spinning that coursed behind her eyes. Blinking several times, she felt far more balanced, and continued looking up into the sky. Millions of tiny stars glittered against the inky black expanse as the full moon shimmered with its abundant glow. Her dark eyes grew soft as she acknowledged the simple beauty of it, and she sighed silently as she lowered her gaze and resumed walking toward her destination.

After the sheriff had left her house that evening, the brunette had felt a rush of foreign emotions clamp themselves around her. Invisible feelings squeezing her lungs until she felt as if she couldn't breathe, and when she closed her eyes it seemed like she was falling into a dark abyss of nothingness. No matter what she did nothing was able to aide her affliction, until she downed a tumbler filled with whiskey. It was at that moment that her mind began to quiet and her body slowly fell into a numbing state of relaxation. Grasping onto her newly found realization, the mayor quickly found the number of a babysitter and promptly called the young woman. Although she wasn't familiar with the girl, neither in Storybrooke nor in Fairytale Land, she obviously was not thinking clearly and eagerly left the woman to care for her son while she attended to her conflicted affairs.

Ever since the blonde had arrived in town, Regina had found herself gradually change within her mind. She began to have thoughts that had never fazed her previously, mood swings that had never been that vicious, but most of all feelings that the brunette had thought became dormant decades ago. But once the beautiful stranger had crashed into her quaint, little town everything inside of the mayor's mind seemed to morph and she didn't enjoy the feeling of it one bit. These trivial things that were awakening inside of her would only cause great pain and even greater weakness, and Regina knew that both of those elements could inevitably ruin everything for her. So, she simply drank and drank, and then drank some more until she felt her desires falter and flitter away as her inebriation settled in.

Growling under her breath the brunette became aware of the notion that no matter how intoxicated she was the thoughts of Emma would never leave her mind. She was a force to be reckoned with, an incredibly strong woman, and yet for the past couple of weeks nothing she did would stop the feelings that welled up inside of her whenever the sheriff was around. It sickened her. But, ultimately, there was absolutely no action she could take that would drive her internal thoughts away; nothing she could do that would stop her heart from hammering and fluttering when the blonde was near.

Shaking away her jumbled thoughts, Regina let her eyes focus back to the present and she realized that she had finally reached her father's crypt. Taking another large gulp of the wine, the brunette stumbled up the few steps and pressed the door open, nearly falling inside when it fell away from the casing. Catching herself haphazardly, the mayor walked inside and placed the flowers gently atop the cool surface of the coffin alongside the nearly empty bottle. As she brushed her fingers over her father's name she let a sob rip from her lungs while burning tears ran down her cheeks.

"Daddy," she whimpered, letting her eyes fill with fresh tears, "I don't know what to do—I wish you were here…I wish you could tell me what I should do…"

Her chest heaved as her heart pounded loudly within her ears; her lungs seeming to catch on fire from the burning breaths that shuddered from her lips. Although the brunette carried a great wealth of pain within her tainted heart, the greatest pain of all was the loss of her father; that she had ripped the beating heart from his chest just so that she could be happy. And yet, even after destroying the only thing she truly loved happiness had yet to encompass her in its warm grasp. Oh, how she wished she could turn back time before she had enacted the curse, before she had murdered her own flesh and blood. But while these thoughts buzzed throughout her mind, she heard that dark, threatening voice speak up, berating her for her weakness and loss of resolve. Although the voice was her's she knew deep down that they were not her words and that over time she had grown into a person that she hated. Of course, she was the Evil Queen, the woman that could make anyone quiver in fear at the sight of her. But right now, and in her heart for always, she wasn't evil, she was Regina; a woman scorned who let hatred and pain overtake her in a cloak of darkness and she was now paying the torturous, eternal price for it.

"I'm sorry…about everything—all of it." The brunette couldn't stop crying, and she bleakly wiped at her cheeks as they were once again covered with her sorrow. "You have no idea how much I…how much I hate myself for what I've done. All I want is—"

The noise of a branch breaking in the distance stopped her from speaking as she covered her mouth, a scared gasp escaping between her fingers. What if someone was out there, what if they saw her like this? The thoughts spun a web of hesitation within her liquor addled mind, and her nails dug into the cold stone of the wall as she tried to hide herself in the darkness. After several moments of silence, Regina heard nothing more from her spot inside the crypt and she let her hand fall away, taking in deep, hitched breaths as she let her eyes flutter closed in relief.

"Emma Swan—the new sheriff…" the brunette began in a whisper, her words falling from her mouth in a jagged, frightened tone, "…she's going to destroy me. She…she makes me feel things that I—" Taking a deep shaking breath, Regina let a few silent tears escape her eyes as she delves deeply into her heart to reveal her most intimate thoughts to her beloved father. "—that I don't—that I can't feel. I just can't, daddy, and it's eating me alive."

The quiet whispers had quickly escalated to louder, tortured sobs as she felt her heart being pried open at her confession. The very prospect of having her words littered into the world made the last morsel of her strength crumble, and she collapsed against the coffin and wept. Dark eyes burned as hot liquid seeped from them incessantly, and her body shuddered harshly from the anguish that exploded inside of her. Throughout the duration of the evening she had slowly become undone, until she felt every inkling of pain she had ever felt burst from her as she spoke privately to her father. Every bad memory, every traumatic event fell from her eyes in the form of tears until she felt so empty that she continued to cry because she felt so disgustingly weak.

"Who's there?"

Regina's head snapped up as she heard the familiar voice calling from outside of the stone crypt. The brunette's body was frozen in fear as her eyes burned from the luminous glow of a flashlight that seeped in from the small crack of the open door. She remained quiet, the blonde woman had already seen a sliver of her weakness earlier that evening, and the mayor did not want her to ever see that side of her again. No matter what she did she would not be able to muster the composure that was acceptable for other's to see; she was too far gone.

"When someone asks you a question you—"

The sheriff pushed the door open forcefully as she spoke, but was quickly rendered silent as she saw the 'intruder' before her. The mayor's torso was sprawled across the stone coffin, her slight weight crushing a dozen white flowers beneath her. Dark hair was disheveled and fell over red, glossy eyes and glistening cheeks. Her red lips were parted as shuddering breaths rose from her throat in startled gasps. Emma lowered her flashlight quickly as she slowly emerged deeper into the crypt, standing closer to the fallen woman.

"Madame Mayor," she whispered dumbstruck, placing a gentle hand on the crying woman's shoulder, "are you alright?"

"This is none of your concern!" The brunette seethed venomously as she recklessly pulled away from the blonde's touch, "you have no right to be here!"

Reaching out towards Regina quickly, Emma grasped onto a slender arm and dragged her back onto her feet before she fell backwards. Black eyes glared at her in pure, fiery anger and the blonde mentally flinched as the older woman pushed her roughly. Forcing herself not to stumble, she grabbed onto the cold cover of the coffin and for the first time acknowledged the half-empty bottle of wine. Narrowing her eyes she traced her long fingers over it delicately, and then shifted her gaze to the rattled woman who was visibly shaking with rage. Stepping closer, the sheriff could smell the liquor on Regina's breath, and she cursed at herself for not noticing it earlier.

"You're drunk," the blonde said matter-of-factly as she placed her hands on her hips involuntarily, "and you're acting crazy—wait…what about, Henry?"

"I have it taken care of, dear," the mayor snipped as she predatorily entered Emma's personal space, "I am his mother after all."

"This is nuts, I'm taking you home."

"You have no right! This is **my** town, and this is **my** father's crypt. Just because you're the sheriff now, Ms. Swan does **not** mean you can overtake my authority."

Pale and dark eyes challenged each other silently, as the two women stared at each other in an attempt to get the other to follow their will. But, both being stubborn neither woman budged on their respective notions. Sighing softy, Emma lowered her gaze to the floor; she wanted so badly to be angry with the mayor, to have the strength to arrest her for unconcealed alcohol in community lots, or disruptive behavior, anything. And yet, the only feeling or thoughts that the blonde could muster about the woman in front of her was pity and worry. She was terribly frightened for her and she had an inexplicable urge to wrap the broken woman in her arms and tell her that everything would be okay; that she was safe with her.

"But this is my job…" the sheriff sighed in exasperation as she flicked her gaze back up towards the brunette, "I can't just leave you here."

"Yes you can, dear," the mayor retorted, the icy tone having left her voice, "and you will."

"Look, Madame Mayor, either you come with me willingly and I take you home," Emma began, as she crossed her arms over her chest, "or you fight me and I take you into custody. Your move."

"You've got to be kidding me…" Regina fumed, her eyes narrowing as she took in the blonde shaking her head; her hands quickly balled into tight fists, "under what grounds?"

"Consuming alcohol on public property, disruptive behavior, insubordination…do I need to continue?"

The brunette shook her head in disgust as she turned away from the sheriff and scrubbed her hands over her face roughly. Although she had made it through her debate with the younger woman mostly unscathed she was still severely intoxicated, and she felt her brain swim inside her skull wearily. Perhaps this wasn't such a bad thing; after all she was excruciatingly tired and had been dreading the walk home. But, simultaneously she wished that she wouldn't have given up her resolve so quickly, she had much more fight left within her, and yet she couldn't seem to muster the passionate anger she once could when pitted against the immovable blonde. It was those sickening feelings that were holding her back; Regina's mind whispered that she would sooner cut out her very own heart than to let her feeble emotions dictate her, and yet she knew that the thought was a lie.

Turning around quickly, the mayor shuffled around Emma and over towards the foot of the coffin. Pressing her fingers against the cool stone again, she let her eyes close as she tried to get a grasp on herself; tried to reign in the torrid storm of emotions that spun out of control behind her eyes. She felt like screaming and crying, but instead she merely reached a hand towards the bottle of wine that remained atop of the casket and lifted it to her lips. But before she could take a much needed gulp of the bitter liquid she felt a warm, gentle hand cover her own and pry the bottle away slowly. Shooting daggers with her black eyes, Regina lunged after the bottle but was halted by a firm grip on her shoulders. The blonde had set the bottle behind her and was now holding the mayor's shoulders with both hands, staring directly into her eyes.

"Regina, look at yourself!" Emma commanded, shaking the woman slightly as she felt the older woman fight against her hold. "You can barely walk straight, and you smell like a brothel. This isn't you!"

"**This**," the brunette shouted, motioning to herself as she finally pulled away from the sheriff's grasp on her, "is your fault!"

"How in the hell—"

"Don't be stupid, Ms. Swan, you know exactly what I'm talking about!" the brunette felt her mind begin to settle as she yelled at the other woman; it felt good to finally be able to be successfully angry with her. "Henry. All he wants is you— I **raised** him! **I** am his mother...and he hates me—he **hates** me…"

"Regina…"

"No!" the mayor continued, unaware that tears were tumbling down her cheeks as she spoke, "you don't get to speak. You lost that privilege when you decided to make my life a living hell—when you made me feel…"

Her words were lost upon her as ragged whimpers reverberated throughout the small, stone crypt. Regina let herself cry; her hand covering her mouth as her body wracked violently with shuddering sobs. Without thinking Emma closed the space between them and wrapped her long arms tightly around the shaking woman. The brunette tried to fight her way out of the warm embrace, but eventually she gave up and fell into it completely; her thin arms looping around the younger woman's waist as her face pressed against a long neck. Regina's fingers dug deeply into the thick leather jacket that Emma was wearing as she held onto her desperately. Slowly, she began to calm down as she listened to the steady pulse of the blonde, and the reassuring whispered litanies of '_I'm sorry_'.

Emma's heart had shattered as she listened to the tear-filled confession of the mayor; all she wanted was to be happy and no matter what she did it always seemed as though someone got in the way of that. This time, it was her and the blonde felt terrible. When she had gathered the courage and finally embraced the nearly hysterical woman she wasn't prepared for the hurricane of sensations that flooded through her veins and directly into her heart. As the delicious feelings washed over her she felt the lithe frame against her pull away gently and she lifted her head, gazing into glassy black eyes. For a moment Emma couldn't read the emotions that fluttered behind Regina's eyes, but once she could she had to choke back a sob of her own as she witnessed the well of pain that waded within the dark depths. Cautiously, she lifted a hand and brushed away the tears from a perfectly sculpted cheek; eventually, the sheriff simply let her fingers caress the smooth, moist skin in hopes that it would soothe the aching woman.

As she felt gentle fingers brush against her cheeks, Regina looked into soft green eyes and the compassion that radiated from them made her heart flutter rapidly in her chest. She wasn't sure if it was the alcohol, or her fatigue but something inside of her mind silenced and let her fall deeper and deeper into the swelling waves of emotion. Before she realized what she was doing, the brunette felt her body press up tightly against the hard body of the sheriff's as their lips crashed together. Emma's eyes fluttered shut as she felt herself pushed backwards until she banged into a cold, stone wall roughly, but ignored it as she let her mouth open and coaxed Regina's tongue inside. The kiss was full of hunger and confliction; teeth nipping roughly at full lips, tongues twirling wildly as nails dug violently into flesh. It was delicious and forbidden, and neither woman could contain their desire for one another as touches became bolder and moans grew louder.

"Regina…" the sheriff groaned, as the older woman's lips dropped to her throat, licking up the sensitive column. Green eyes slid open, and after they refocused Emma realized where they were, and why they were there and her body stiffened. "Regina—Regina, stop…"

Everything was lost upon the brunette as she feasted on the younger woman's tender flesh, sucking and biting as she felt her body alight with a raging fire. In the back of her mind she could hear it hissing at her to stop, that if she were to venture further into her sexual endeavors it would bring about her demise. But she couldn't stop herself, the lust that coursed through her veins combined with the alcohol induced a rather animalistic, carnal hunger to churn inside her loins and she was beginning to lose herself in the haze of it all. Though, as she felt the body beneath her become rigid, and the voice from above tell her to stop, she looked up, her eyes flashing dangerously at Emma.

"Not here…not like this…" the sheriff breathed, trying to gingerly pull the woman away from her.

"But, I want you…" Regina hissed against the blonde's ear, feeling a shiver run through the muscular frame, and she smirked knowingly, "…and I know you want me, too."

"I said no…" said Emma with more force, as she grabbed the mayor by the wrists and pushed her away, but maintained her hold on the woman, "you're drunk—you don't know what you're doing…I won't be your mistake."

Dark eyes glared at the sheriff in heated anger, and the brunette's mouth contorted into a tight snarl as her fingernails bit deeply into the flesh of her palms. The blonde watched as the disgust washed over the beautiful woman's face, but she knew that she was doing the right thing and stood by her decision. No matter how badly she missed the way the older woman felt pressed against her she would not abuse her clear headed state by taking advantage of the drunken woman. But, Regina didn't see it that way; she merely saw it as someone who was playing with her emotions; the emotions that she had bottled up so well until the blonde had come in and pushed every single one of the mayor's buttons. She had coaxed the feelings directly from her heart and then rejected the dark woman, and the brunette would not accept that type of treatment, not after all she had been through. So, in a blind, unknowing rage, Regina pulled her arms away from the sheriff's grasp, pulled back and resoundingly slapped the unsuspecting woman violently across the face.

"Jesus Christ!" Emma hissed as the pain in her cheek pounded against her head, and she brushed her fingertips over the reddening skin.

"Take me home, Ms. Swan…" the brunette said strictly; although all of the anger had evaporated from her body she was still clearly annoyed, and the sting that tingled through her fingers didn't seem to help. "I want to go home…now."

Gapping wordlessly, the sheriff shook her head, still shocked, and merely nodded her head towards the door as she walked away from the mayor. Nothing about this evening was normal; it was as if some higher power were playing with her life in the form of a game. First, she had witnessed Regina crying in the backyard while she was spending time with Henry, and comforted her accordingly. Then, she was promptly kicked out of the woman's house, only to find her in an even worse state hours later after being called to investigate strange on goings. Finally, the woman had kissed her, and then quickly slapped her across the face. All in one night she wanted to scream, cry, shout and laugh, which wasn't anything at all like Emma, and she hated feeling that way. But as she slumped her shoulders and walked out into the cool night air, she knew that all of her emotional wirings went haywire whenever Regina was around and she simply wished that it would stop as these feelings she was beginning to have for this insufferable woman was bound to cause her great pain.

With both women lost in their own thoughts, they walked in silence to the cruiser; neither even bothering to acknowledge the other's presence as it seemed to cause too much confusion and a wide spectrum of combating emotions. After a few moments of distracted walking they reached the car, and Emma pulled open the passenger side door and quickly rounded the car as the brunette slipped inside. An awkward silence filtered within the vehicle as the two women fumbled with their seatbelts, and as they turned to snap them in place their eyes met. Green staring into black and vice versa; they remained holding each other's gaze for a few fleeting seconds when Regina clicked her's in place and shifted her body so that she was looking out the window. The blonde looked after her as a frown pulled at her lips, and she slowly let her gaze redirect to the road as she turned on the ignition.

Regina watched absently as trees and houses flittered by her window, but she was too far gone into the realm of her thoughts to notice. Although she could still feel the burn of the wine in her stomach, she could also feel her head slowly begin to clear which wasn't necessarily a good thing. She began to curse herself violently for letting her emotions and desires get the better of her; not only did she declare all of the hurtful imaginings about her son, she had fallen into temptation and had kissed the woman. She shook her head gently in distain, how had she let herself lose so much self-control? It had been one jarring evening that could have been easily cured by a good night's rest. And yet, as she closed her eyes and remembered the feeling of Emma's lips against her's, the brunette wasn't sure if she would have traded her mistakes and fumbles for a clean slate.

Smiling softly, she let the tips of her fingers brush against her lips; but quickly pulled them away as she felt the cruiser come to a steady halt. Opening her eyes quickly, Regina saw that they were parked outside of her house, and she breathed deeply, both in relief and disappointment. Turning toward Emma she opened her mouth to say something, but decided against it; no, her heart was weak and she had ignored it for years she could easily continue to do so. Closing her mouth, she knew that, at least for tonight, she would not let herself be tempted by frivolous emotions. It was a stupid game that only the weak played and if she were going to find her happiness she could not be bolstered by a fluttering heart, or soft lips. She needed a sharp, forceful mind; love, infatuation, or even a meager crush was out of the question. And as she felt her strength build up at the very thought, the brunette opened the door in an attempt to get as far away from this night as possible when a gentle hand stopped her. Leaning back into the car she looked into pale, tired eyes and lifted a dark brow in question.

"Regina—I—" the blonde stumbled over her words, as she looked up meekly at the older woman, "I just…"

"Goodnight, Ms. Swan." The mayor interrupted, snatching her arm away from the tender hand as she slammed the car door in the process.

Watching as the woman stormed away Emma slowly let her hand drift back to the steering wheel which she gripped with anguish. She had tried her hardest to reach out to Regina; had tried her very best to smooth things over from where they had left off in the cemetery. But her words were not given the ability to be voiced and the blonde felt as though the woman had ripped the very heart from chest; everything had become numb. Perhaps it wasn't worth the heartache; after all, if you sleep with the enemy all you'll end up with are stained sheets. And even as the thoughts ring true in Emma's head she can't push the thought of wanting to be there for the brunette; wanting to be with her. Shaking her head, she shifted the car into gear and took off; there was nothing she could do, the mayor just did not have the same set of feelings that she did.

But, as Emma raced down the street towards the Sheriff's Department, Regina banged her head against the door as she slumped against it. Her heart sobbing in her chest as her lungs burned, and she slowly released a breath that she hadn't known she was holding. The brunette's body was still tingling from the gentle touch, and her resolve of being strong was easily crumbling beneath her. Perhaps driving delicate emotions away wasn't as easy as developing jagged ones; and as she took in a second, deep, gulping breath she knew that the only way that she could maintain any modicum of strength was if she were to stay away from a certain Emma Swan.

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><p><strong>AN: Alright, so I didn't have anytime to proof-read this so I'm sure it's terrible, but bear with me; I got a random burst of inspiration through the middle of the night and pounded this out as quickly as I could. Regardless of my opinions, if you enjoyed it please, please review so that I may be overwhelmed enough to complete a few new chapters through the duration of the weekend. All of the people who have reviewed so far are lovely, and I adore each and everyone of you. Like I said, this chapter is NOT great, but I hope you like it despite that, and that you continue reading. But, as always, review if you'd like!**


	3. Chapter Three

**Chapter Three  
><strong>_"We do what we need to be free"_

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><p>The ticking off the clock reverberated throughout the Sheriff's Department, bouncing back and forth between cement walls until it reached Emma's ears. The incessant clicking of the hands was magnified in her anguished mind, and it seemed as though every tick was like the violent blow of a battering ram against her skull. Sighing, the blonde let her pale face fall into the awaiting palms of her hands while her eyes clenched shut. There was too much pain within her; she just couldn't bear the heaviness of it, the darkness of it. It sliced through her like a dagger and all she could do was watch as her emotions poured from her like blood.<p>

Over the hours Emma had become the embodiment of a mess: her eyes red and lined with dark circles; hair falling in stringy, wheat colored strands against an unnaturally pale face. But, her appearance wasn't even close to the turmoil that rallied behind her eyes. Thinking it over the blonde couldn't believe that it had all started less than twenty-four hours ago; it seemed as though she had been locked within this cage of despair for an eternity—a cage in which Regina had entrapped her in. As the mere thought of the dark woman flashed throughout her mind, Emma's eyes moved rapidly behind her closed lids; her tear-stained face burned against the blonde's cranium and tears sprang to her green eyes. Perhaps she wasn't the only one who was trapped inside her own brain; perhaps Regina was fighting a similar battle against her own demons.

Clawing her fingers roughly through her tangled hair, Emma tried in vain to lessen the suffering within her, by distracting her mind from the notions that plagued her. But it was useless; nothing would quell the destruction within her. It made her angry. Everything seemed to make her angry. Regina, herself, the way her emotions held her in a chokehold leaving her body heaving with an unquenchable ache. Emma bit her lip roughly as she pulled at her hair viciously; not only was the pain delicious, but it also seemed to add fuel to the fire of her anger.

Her emotions were quickly coiling around her until there was so much tension piled within her lithe frame that it felt as though her ribs would crack and break from the pressure. The heat within her veins continued to course throughout her body and into her heart, which began to beat faster and faster until Emma was nearly breathless. She felt as though she were going insane, as if her very grasp on reality and sanity were on the cusp of falling into an eternal abyss of damnation. As this thought pounded behind her eyes, the blonde's ears were once again filled with the continuous _tick, tick, tick _of the clock…and Emma broke completely.

Green eyes flew open as the blonde pushed herself away from her desk as she stood. With flames licking at her stomach, and thoughts gnawing at her heart, Emma let a scream burst from her lungs as she violently pushed everything off the surface of her desk. Papers fluttered to the ground as pens clattered across the tiles and a mug crashed against the floor. The idea of chaos and wreckage rectified her anguish and with one last burst of energy the blonde flipped the wooden desk over which caused an explosion of sound to caress her ears. As the noise settled Emma felt her knees become weak, and she let her body fall to the ground in a sobbing heap; her whimpers covering her like a blanket.

"Emma?" a small, strangled voice asked; the word heavy with compassion and fear.

A sharp gasp tumbled from the blonde's lips; her body shaking numbly as her eyes flickered open hesitantly. Brushing the tears away, Emma's blurry gaze wafted out through the door to her office and towards the cells. A look of pure shame painted across her face as her eyes met Mary Margaret's, and she hung her head in dismay; blonde strands shielding her like an impenetrable force. In Emma's state she had failed to remember that the brunette was still in custody at the station as the investigation of Kathryn's murder was ongoing; she never would have let herself fall apart so completely if she had remembered. And now, beneath the other woman's warm gaze, the blonde felt sick, and small; wholly unsure of what to do next. Her wall was her savior and her curse, but now as the barrier continued to crumble and chip away she felt vulnerable and scared; all she wanted to do was stop the tears from spilling onto her cheeks, to pretend as though nothing had happened, but she couldn't, and another sob ripped from her throat as she sat among the havoc she caused.

"Oh, Emma…" Mary Margaret breathed, her green eyes burning with tears as she looked over at the fallen woman, "…come on, come here."

Lifting her eyes once more, Emma stared at her friend beneath slick eyelashes, and this time didn't turn away. Mary Margaret was standing pressed up against the cool, metal bars, one hand gripped tightly around one of the rungs, the other outstretched, reaching towards the blonde in a gentle, coaxing manner. Taking a few shuddering breaths, Emma slowly extracted herself from the floor and lifted her weary body into a standing position. As she walked the short distance to the brunette she felt her heart swell with love, the organ pitter pattering in her chest reassuringly. For the first time in the blonde's life the fear of showing weakness didn't seem so frightening after all.

When Emma was in reaching distance of Mary Margaret, she lifted her hand and laced her fingers around the other woman's. The touch was reassuring and soothing, and the blonde felt as though the gentle grasp pulled her back from the brink of tumbling over the edge. Her heart stopped beating as fervently, her thoughts calmed and slowed within her mind, and she could feel the tears stop rolling down her cheeks. The brunette seemed to be her savior, and Emma rewarded her with a small, tragic smile. They had only known each other for a couple of months, and yet the blonde couldn't remember having a more familial relationship with anyone; the thought of Mary Margaret caring for her so openly made Emma relax even more.

"What…what happened that made you so upset?" the brunette asked softly, her large green eyes boring into the blonde's with intense warmth.

"Regina…" Emma sighed, leaning against the bars to get closer to the comforting woman, "it's always Regina…"

"What did she do to you?"

"She…" surprised by the gruffness in the small woman's voice, the blonde shook her head unsure of what to say, "…she kissed me…"

"Oh my…"

"It's stupid…" Emma quipped, biting her lip as she saw the horrified expression wash over Mary Margaret's face, "…I shouldn't have said anything."

"No, no…I—" squeezing the blonde's hand reassuringly the brunette smiled through the bars of her cell as she shook away her initial shock, "I just never would have assumed that's what made you so…"

"Crazy?"

The two women laughed softly together at Emma's obvious lapse of sanity, which oddly seemed to lighten the mood even further than it already had. For the first time in hours the blonde felt herself genuinely smile, and it felt extremely comforting to have a small wealth of the weight lifted from her. At that moment, with a soft smirk caressing her lips, and her hand being held tightly, Emma felt, for the second time, that Mary Margaret was her savior; in a matter of minutes she had pulled her from the brink of madness and into a modicum of lightness. The blonde didn't know how she could ever possibly repay her friend for everything she had done, but thinking it over she knew that the brunette would never ask for anything in return because that is what people who care about each other do: quell the pain and lessen the load so that their loved ones can carry on.

"How…" Mary Margaret started, but then stopped herself as she tried to find the right words for her question, "…how did it happen?"

"The craziness, the kiss, or both?" Emma asked, her pale eyes glimmering mischievously.

"Both."

"Well…" the blonde started, becoming tired just thinking about the previous night's events.

Taking a few deep breaths Emma began retelling every detail that transpired the night before; everything from the moment she found Regina beneath her apple tree until she had dropped the mayor off at her home. The blonde even mentioned that after her altercations with the brunette that she had been so upset and confused that she couldn't sleep. So, she numbly drove around Storybrooke for the rest of the night in a haze, only stopping when she realized that it was time for her shift to begin. Emma felt all of the darkness pour from her soul as she explained to the brunette about all of the feelings that welled up inside of her; how her anger had inevitably taken over, thus why her office was now is a state of obvious disarray. After all of her thoughts were out in the open, the blonde stifled a yawn and leaned against the bars; noticing for the first time in hours how tired she was.

Mary Margaret had listened intently; stroking her thumb over Emma's shaking hand as a way of comforting her as she delved into the tumultuous memories. But, after all was revealed, she bleakly looked over the blonde wishing that there was something she could do to quell the pain. Though, deep inside of her the brunette knew that there was nothing that she could do to fix the events that had already happened, and that whatever was to come next for both women had to be dealt with on their own terms; without a third party interfering. Because Mary Margaret knew that Emma and Regina would both have to come to realization in the near future, or be plagued for the rest of their lives; while the blonde had spun her story, the brunette came to the conclusion that perhaps what these two women were feeling for each other was something all together more powerful than hate could ever imagine being.

"Ugh," Emma groaned, pushing away from the cell and gently removing her hand from Mary Margaret's, "why does hating someone have to be so complicated?"

"What do you mean?" the brunette questioned skeptically, eyeing the blonde as she paced back and forth in front of the cells.

"I can never get her off my mind—she's always there, no matter what I do! And then there are these…" Emma stopped for a minute, looking blankly at the wall in front of her, her voice taking on a slightly dreamy quality as she continued, "…these feelings that I've never felt before…" Scoffing, the blonde walked back over towards Mary Margaret and gripped the bars in frustration. "God, she makes me crazy!"

"Emma…" the brunette started as she lay a gently hand against the blonde's, when the other woman's gaze met her's she continued, "…maybe it isn't hatred…that you feel for Regina?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean…what if there's another reason—what if you're in—"

As the stuttered accusation began to caress her ears, and dance around inside her mind, Emma's eyes grew wide with fear. Before Mary Margaret's notions were even completely formed, and released from her lips, the blonde knew what she was going to say, and the very thought frightened her. With her heart beating fervently within her chest, and her thoughts racing at an accelerated speed, Emma stumbled backwards until she felt the deputy's desk press against her thighs. This type of thing didn't happen to the blonde; she didn't fall into these types of feelings—one night stands and friends with benefits were what suited her best. Open enough to feel pleasure, but closed enough to make sure that nothing within her became skewed or hurt. No, she thought to herself as she shook her head, this could not be happening.

"No," Emma said, repeating the litany of thoughts that pounded inside her skull, "no, don't say it—this isn't happening."

"You can't stop thinking about her, Emma—" the brunette began, her fingers grasping tightly to the cool, metal bars, "—she's always in your head; she makes you feel things that you've never felt before…" Mary Margaret paused for a moment as she chewed on her lip, her green eyes beginning to water slightly as she tried to get her last words to flow from her throat, "…that's _exactly_ how David makes me feel…"

"It's not the same, it's—"

"I've seen the way you look at her—I heard the way you talk about her. Whatever it is that you feel for Regina…it isn't hate."

Gripping onto the desk with stubby fingernails Emma let Mary Margaret's words course throughout her until they echoed nosily inside her brain. Letting her eyes fall shut the blonde thought back to the night before and everything that she had felt; the way a shiver ran along her spine when she had held Regina's hand beneath the apple tree; how her heart stopped when the dark woman's lips pressed against hers. Everything. Every feeling that she had felt in the past twenty-four hours piled up inside of her and injected themselves into her heart until it was fluttering so quickly that Emma felt as though she couldn't breathe. She was scared—terrified that the brunette was right, that all of these strange sensations and notions that had developed over the past couple of months when she thought about the mayor was the very opposite of hate. And no matter how deep the blonde tried to bury these thoughts, there was a small section in the back of her mind that knew she had accidentally fallen in love with the woman that she was supposed to hate.

"If this _is_ love…" Emma whispered, as her eyes opened and her gaze fell back onto the brunette, "…then why does it feel so shitty?"

Mary Margaret smiled softly as she began to speak, "because love is complicated—it's hard. It's…magical—and something that beautiful is never easy. When you know what you want and are ready to fight for it…you also have to know what you're willing to give up."

Silence descended upon the Sheriff's Department as both women slowly fell away from reality and into their own thoughts. Mary Margaret wondered how her and David had fallen away from each other so quickly, and how it had left a terribly sour taste in her mouth. While Emma let the idea of actually being in love with someone settle into her brain; it was daunting, and she wasn't entirely sure that she was ready to deal with the prospect, especially when it was the mayor who seemed to gather her affections. But, if what the brunette was saying was true, then if she ever wanted a shot at love she would have to be willing to do whatever it took to get it. Eventually, as the thoughts within her head became too much, Emma snapped herself back into reality and looked over towards the clock; it was nearly eight and she could feel herself gently falling into a state of heavy fatigue. Pushing away from the desk, she shoved her hands into her pockets and walked over towards Mary Margaret.

"Hey, I'm gonna run over to Granny's for some coffee, you want any?"

After a few moments without an answer, Emma was about to turn and leave when she noticed the brunette blink several times as she shook her, seemingly coming out of a daze. Peering into the woman's watery eyes, the blonde brushed her fingers gently against the other woman's hand to rouse her from her thoughts. When their eyes met Mary Margaret merely nodded her head, although she wasn't very tired she figured the hot beverage would aide in soothing her sore heart. The blonde gave her a small smile before she turned and left the station. As she watched her friend leave Mary Margaret could only hope that Emma wouldn't make the same mistakes with love that she had.

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><p><strong>AN: First, I just wanted to apologize for the delay with this chapter; I've been extremely busy with school (only one week until exams, eek!) so I didn't have much time to write. Anyway, I've nearly completed the fourth chapter, so I hope to have that up and running later tonight or early tomorrow. Again, I really hope that all of you readers stick with this story, even if my writing seems to be a bit wobbly (this chapter is quite short and I'm sure it probably doesn't sit well with the others) but I hope that you will continue to read it anyway. Also, as always review if you'd like :)**


	4. Chapter Four

**Chapter Four  
><strong>_"And it leans on me like a rootless tree."_

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><p>Henry fidgeted in his seat while he pushed his scrambled eggs around the white plate distractedly, his dark brows furrowing as he stared across the table to his mother. The boy had been thrust into a state of utter confusion ever since he had found Emma and the mayor beneath the apple tree; their fingers laced together. Although that sight not only made Henry fear for the blonde's safety as she was so close to evil incarnate, but it also weaved a strange turn of events that the boy just couldn't seem to understand. As he continued to pick at his eggs, Henry's thoughts turned to his mother—the Evil Queen—and how after Emma had left their house she began to act funny; she seemed distant and hurt. At first he merely shrugged it off, assuming she was plotting some devious plan and had regressed into her own mind, but when the boy had heard her crying through the thin walls of her bedroom he realized that something was clearly wrong with the woman. And, as he gazed at his mother—face resting on her palm, her eyes glazed and vacant—Henry saw the pain warring inside of her, and he bit his lip as a thought crossed him: perhaps she wasn't so evil and heartless after all.<p>

Distracted fingers twirled a spoon around a cup of untouched coffee absently as dark eyes stared blankly into thin air. Regina couldn't seem to get a grasp on herself; no matter how hard she fought to stay in the present her brain kept forcing her attention back to the previous night's events; her mind verbally lashing her with painful blows at the very thought of her actions. She had kissed Emma, but the worst part of it all was that beneath her drunken inhibitions the brunette had thoroughly enjoyed it. Not only enjoyed it, but even then, as she sat in Granny's with her son, she felt herself longing to feel the blonde's body pressed against her, her lips caressing her skin. It was all so absurd and unfathomable that Regina had resorted to closing herself off completely; lost in the dreary dregs of her emotions and thoughts, unable to resurface as the notion of her feelings for Emma crashed around her. The brunette simply did not want to think about—didn't want to acknowledge what her heart seemed to scream at her. Love was out of the question. As the disconcerting four letter word hammered inside her chest, Regina felt herself roughly pushed back into reality as the sound of the door to Granny's swung open. Stiffening visibly, the brunette squeezed the spoon within her palm tightly, the metal biting into the tender flesh, as the fear of who had arrived raced down her spine.

Emma had opted to walk to Granny's instead of driving; she felt that the cool morning air would help to settle the ache within her chest, and aide in realizing that Mary Margaret's words were merely that: just words. As she walked the short distance from the station to the small diner, the blonde nearly laughed at herself; how could she possibly believe for a second that she was in love with Regina? _Because she's intelligent, strong, powerful, quick witted, beautiful, a phenomenal kisser…_Before she could catch herself, the sheriff found her brain reciting off all of the admirable and attractive qualities of the mayor. The very thought that her mind was reeling with reasons why she could have fallen in love with Regina seemed to make her head spin. Shaking the dizziness from her view, Emma wrapped her jacket more tightly around her and peered up at the sky, it was an unusually chilly day, and the clouds hung thick and gray in the air: it was going to rain. Picking up her pace, the blonde jogged across the street towards Granny's, pulled open the door and stalked inside.

Without missing a beat, Emma crossed the diner to the front counter, leaning against it firmly as she scrubbed her cold hands against her face. After a few moments, Ruby sashayed over to the blonde and leaned forward, smiling brightly at the stricken woman. Peering over at the brunette, Emma gave her a small smirk as she stood and placed her and Mary Margaret's order. As she watched Ruby turn and rush back toward the kitchen the blonde felt the hair on the back of her neck rise, the air within Granny's changing completely: someone was watching her. Turning around quickly, Emma's gaze immediately fell into heated, dark eyes and she felt as though her body burst into flames at the mere sight of Regina. Everything within her seemed to shift as a wave of thoughts cascaded within her mind: the way her body trembled when she had laced her finger's around the brunette's; how her heart had pounded in unison with her center as the older woman kissed her forcefully; but the last thought on her mind was Mary Margaret's words from moments ago: _…maybe it isn't hatred…that you feel for Regina?_ And while the emotions beat down upon her, green eyes widened as the realization hit her; no matter how much she wanted to deny it, over the past couple of months Emma had quickly and recklessly began to fall in love with the mayor.

Black eyes glared across Granny's as Regina took in the sight of the blonde who was destroying everything for her: her life, her family, her heart…With the last thought ringing through her ears, the brunette snapped her eyes away from Emma and stood quickly; her chair toppling to the floor with the pressure. Everyone within the diner turned to look in the direction of the noise, and gasped in unison as they witnessed the expression of unadulterated anger press against Regina's face. Shooting daggers at everyone who dared to stare at her, the brunette rounded the table and grabbed Henry by the hand, forcefully pulling him away from his untouched breakfast. Confused, the boy followed his mother's gaze as her eyes flickered back to Emma, and he winced as he realized the blonde was the reason for the mayor's destructive state.

"But, mom, I wanna talk to, Emma…" Henry protested as he tried to pull away from her grasp, "…please."

"Henry—" Regina warned, her eyes remaining firmly fixed on the blonde who was starting to approach their table, "we're leaving."

"Madame Mayor?" The blonde asked shakily, as she neared the dark woman and her son.

"You will go away, Ms. Swan," the brunette seethed, as she successfully pulled Henry from his seat, "if you know what's good for you."

The flash of pain that flickered within Emma's gaze at her harsh words made Regina feel as though her chest had been ripped open with a dagger. And although it hurt beyond belief, the brunette knew deep down within her soul that this was the only way; her heart was cold and tainted black by years of abuse and misuse and she inevitably always hurt the one's she loved. After everything she tried to push away, to strangle until dormant, she would not let this blonde break down her wall; she would not let Emma steal her heart. Though, somewhere safely buried inside of her, Regina knew that the blonde had already touched her in ways no one else ever dared to; ever wanted to— and it was that bittersweet thought that made her know that the delicious feelings of tenderness and love would never grasp her. For if she tried to love her, the brunette thought, in the end Emma would not make it out alive; no one ever did.

"Please, Regina…" the blonde whispered, as she begged for the mayor to listen to her words.

Regina's dark eyes softened, and she felt her free hand twitch as it ached to reach out and capture Emma's warm cheek in its palm; to run slender fingers through unruly blonde locks as a steady grip pressed Emma's face closer to the brunette's until their lips brushed. But, the hand remained still, never indulging in its hunger to touch the blonde's flesh; it would have been far too painful: tasting the forbidden fruit without ever fully being able to savor it.

Shaking herself internally, the brunette let her hard, cold mask resurface as she squeezed her son's hand tighter. Turning quickly, Regina pulled Henry behind her as she made it across the threshold and out the door of the diner. A dozen eyes watched her every move cautiously as she thrust open the door with an incredible force. Two of those eyes belonged to Emma, who watched the dark haired woman exit Granny's whilst taking her heart with her. Raising a hand absently, the blonde brushed her fingers over her chest feeling for the familiar steady rhythm of her heartbeat. It wasn't there, or if it was it had become so shallow and so worried that its beats sounded in quiet flutters that could not be found by a human hand. And while Emma stood in the middle of the diner, with everyone's gaze slowly falling onto her, she felt as though there wasn't anything she could possibly do to fix the rift between her and Regina. Nothing that would ever change the tumultuous nature of their relationship, and yet, the blonde knew that she would willingly work herself to the ground to try and salvage what was left of their hearts and their feelings for one another after the emotionally exhausting experiences they shared the evening before. Clearing her head, Emma peered back out the window and gazed at Regina's retreating form as she crossed the street gracefully: it was now or never, and the blonde knew once her legs began to move that she had decided on 'now'.

"Emma—your coffee?"

"Just…gimme a minute." Emma called over her shoulder as she jogged out of Granny's and towards the dark haired woman.

Once outside, the cool wind whipped around the blonde's body like a violent hand swatting at her, but she didn't seem to notice as she reached the curb. Looking back and forth frantically for any oncoming traffic, Emma raced across the street just as Regina was about to open her car door. Taking a couple of shaking breaths she approached the brunette, standing behind her as she waited for the woman to acknowledge her presence. Regina's body stiffened visibly as she felt the blonde run up behind her; she was so close that the brunette could subtly feel the heat from her body and the harsh spurts of air that fell from her lips.

"Madame Mayor—Madame Mayor, please…can we talk?"

"Ms. Swan—" Regina tried to warn, and yet her voice fell cracked and sullen from her throat.

Noticing the strange interaction between the two women, Henry rounded the car and stood beside Emma, looking at her in confusion; he had never seen the blonde so desperate to speak with his mother and he figured it must be important. Pressing a soft hand against Regina's arm, the boy pulled gently on her coat trying to coax her to turn around. The pleading in her son's touch made the brunette still, and her fingers gingerly fell away from the car door. Turning around slowly, both Henry and Emma's eye widened as they noticed the quick flicker of fear in the mayor's dark eyes when she had finally turned to face them. But the vulnerable gaze faltered and Regina's eyes became hard and cold once more; her impatience and internal terror warring inside of her like a cyclone.

"What?" the brunette spat viciously, as her eyes made contact with Emma's

"I…" looking down at Henry, the blonde laid a tender arm around the boy's shoulders as she addressed him, "Kid, I need to talk to you mom for a minute…alone, alright?"

Eyeing Emma suspiciously, Henry merely shrugged as he pulled away from her loose hold and walked back to the passenger seat, entering the car smoothly. Green eyes followed his every move until the blonde watched the boy pick up his video game and slowly immerse himself into surrealism. Slowly, her gaze shifted back to the woman in front of her and Emma felt her breath hitch as she was caught up in Regina's dark stare once more. Shivering slightly, the blonde realized she had no idea what she was planning to say and as her mind remained blank she lamely thrust her hands into her pockets as if she could find words buried within her jeans.

"Spit it out, Ms. Swan, I don't have all day."

"Can we talk about last night?"

"And what exactly about last night are you referring to, dear?" Regina said sweetly, but underneath the fake smile laid a pit of malice, and Emma felt herself grimace.

"You know exactly what I'm talking about—"

"—I'm afraid I don't" the brunette interrupted pointedly as she placed her hands on her hips.

Of course, after the blonde's question had rattled throughout her brain, Regina knew exactly what Emma was referring to: the kiss, the feelings, the connection—but she didn't want to talk about it; and she certainly didn't even want to think about it. And yet, over the past twelve hours, it seemed like those thoughts were the only ones that the brunette _could_ think about. Everything inside her was screaming and sobbing with confused realization and Emma bringing up these forbidden feelings was only making her inner turmoil spin even more viciously; Regina couldn't take it anymore. As she kept her eyes focused on the blonde's, the mayor knew that Emma was going through the exact same pain and aching that she was, but simultaneously, Regina knew that the blonde wouldn't be giving up as much as much as her if they were to follow the beating whispers of their hearts. And it was with this heavy notion that aided in keeping Regina's mind from cracking and going insane; she already knew what it felt like to snap, to become an altogether different person, and she didn't have the courage to go through that again—she didn't have the courage to be put in the situation of losing someone she loved.

"Jesus Christ, Regina," Emma wailed, stepping even closer to the woman; both bodies were shuddering from the closeness; "you kissed me!"

"How dare you!" Regina bellowed, her eyes flashing violently as she looked around frantically, hoping that no one had heard the blonde's loud confession, "you have _no_ right to bring that up!"

"Of course, my apologies, _Madame Mayor_," the blonde mocked as she took a step back, her arms crossing against her chest instinctively, and "my apologies for forgetting that you couldn't possibly have feelings for someone."

"My feelings for you are none of your—"

The last remaining word or Regina's sentence lodged itself in her throat as the realization of what she had just uttered dawned on her. Dark eyes widened, and a hand flew to her mouth but it was too late to muffle her confession, as it had already filtered from her lips. In her stricken state, the brunette had done the one thing that she had promised herself that she would never do: admit to romantic feelings for anyone, ever again—it only ended badly for her, and the person she loved. As the memories of a "past life" fluttered behind her eyes Regina felt tears rise in her view; blurring Emma's face into a mess of colors. All this time she had done so well; so well to keep her feelings for the irritating blonde a secret—even to herself at times—and now after a few hours of pain and angst she had stated the truth out loud.

Emma's arms disentangled and fell to her sides as her mouth parted, her jaw dropping in shock. She couldn't have possibly heard the brunette's words correctly, could she have? As the blonde let the sentence flutter through her skull over and over again she realized that she hadn't misheard, and that Regina _had_ acknowledged that she possessed feelings for Emma. The very idea shook the blonde to the core, and she felt as though she couldn't breathe properly; her heart was hammering far too quickly within her chest. Taking a hesitant step toward the crumbling woman, Emma reached out a hand and laced their fingers together the exact same way she had when they were standing beneath the apple tree. Regina gasped softly as her watery gaze flickered down to where their hands were intertwined; it was one of the most beautiful things she had ever seen, or felt and all she wanted to do was collapse against the blonde and have the woman hold her for the rest of eternity. But, just before she fully leaned into the touch, the dark, disgruntled voice in the back of her brain reared its ugly head and she nearly whimpered from the mental pain it caused. She didn't want to lose the feelings that were coursing through her, and yet there was a strange power that the voice had over her—a darkness that could resettle itself back into her soul whenever she became too soft. And as she pleaded with her heart to win the battle, Regina's body already began to straighten, and become rigid; the evil within her winning once more.

"You—you have feelings for me…?" Emma questioned quietly, her fingers caressing the soft hand within her grasp.

"Of course, dear," Regina smirked, and she wrapped her fingers around the blonde's hand, within seconds the smile fell from her lips "feelings of annoyance, distaste, dislike…" the brunette emphasized every word by tightening her grip, "…but most importantly hatred."

Green eyes began to water from the intense pain coursing up her arm, and Emma tried to pull away but the hold on her hand was far too tight. A whimper fell from the blonde's lips when Regina finally released her grasp, and as Emma cradled her pulsing hand to her chest, her eyes met the brunette's and they stared at each other for a long moment before Regina sneered and turned around. Unlocking the driver's side, the brunette swung open the door and was about to let herself fall into the comfortable upholstery when she felt a cautious hand reach out and grasp her arm, stopping Regina dead in her tracks. The gentle touch made her soul sob; Emma was trying desperately to make the brunette stay, to talk to her, but Regina knew that if she stayed any longer she would inevitably say more things that she meant—and her heart's confessions would not survive out in the world.

"Regina, please…" Emma begged, and it sounded as if she would break into tears at any given moment, "…don't push me away."

"Ms. Swan, if you do not release me right now, you will regret it."

"Regina—"

Before the blonde could finish her plea, Regina spun around so quickly that Emma gasped from the surprise. Dark eyes were on fire, and the blonde tried to edge away from the anger that was so quickly consuming the woman, but just as she was about to step away she felt two hands dig into her shoulders. The brunette had absolutely no control over her body; the darkness within her had invaded every orifice inside of her until the pent up rage and destruction was on the verge of exploding. Everything good within her screamed at her brain to cease its actions, but it was to no avail, and Regina internally wailed as she watched herself push Emma so roughly away from her that the blonde tripped and toppled into the street. Emma's back crashed against the cement and she took a sharp intake of breath as the pain welled up inside of her.

Henry raced around the car to his mother, yelling accusations at her as everyone from Granny's milled out onto the sidewalk across from the commotion. Regina's mind was whirling in a frenzied haze and she felt herself become dizzy and light headed. The anger and rage had invaded her so quickly that once it had left her system she felt completely empty and weak. Swaying gently, the brunette felt herself fall backward, but the closeness of her car stopped her from getting hurt, or falling onto the ground. The impact of her body hitting against the car made her view fall downward, and when her gaze finally fell back onto the street she felt her eyes swell with tears; how could she have forgotten in her blind rage that she had so blatantly attacked the blonde?

Holding her breath, Regina realized that Emma hadn't moved since she crashed against the road, and the thought of her being seriously injured because of her own actions nearly made Regina sick. With tears falling against her cheeks, the brunette pushed herself away from the car and slowly began to walk into the street. After she had taken one step, she saw Emma stir, and she smiled thankfully to herself as she watched the blonde pull herself into a sitting position. Their eyes met, and Regina felt as though Emma's green eyes were gazing into her very soul; seeing every inch of her that was hidden beneath all of her layers. And as she cautiously began walking towards the blonde again, the brunette stopped quickly as she heard the screeching of tires very close by.

Everyone's head snapped to the side as they watched a large, red tow-truck barrel down the street towards Emma. The blonde was frozen to her spot, her eyes wide and frightened as she watched the vehicle grow closer and closer in distance to her immobile body. Regina's lungs burned as her heart thundered in her chest, this was all her fault, everything terrible that happened was always her fault and the brunette seemed to fully acknowledge it at that moment. Regardless of how much her mind tried to fight it, Emma was in love with her, and deep down she knew that she reciprocated those feelings in full. There was no way that she was going to let this slip away; the blonde was her chance at happiness, and it had taken that terrifying moment of impending loss that made Regina jump into action.

Before she was fully aware of what she was doing, the brunette was racing into the middle of the street towards the blonde; towards the truck that was racing towards Emma. As her heart nearly beat out of her chest, Regina could hear it flutter _I love her, I love her, I love her_…over and over again, and it made her will to fight all the more strong. As she stepped into the street she turned towards the red vehicle, her breath catching in her throat as she tried to quell the fear that roared inside her veins. Shaking her head, she reached down frantically, her fingers wiggling in anticipation for the blonde to grasp onto her offered palm. Emma's eyes quickly met the brunette's, and Regina let the tears roll down her cheeks as she saw the blonde shaking and whimpering in fear. When Emma finally placed her hand in the brunette's, Regina and the blonde quickly looked beside them and noticed that the truck was directly in front of them; there couldn't possibly be enough time for both of them to make it out unscathed, and they panicked.

"Emma!" Regina whimpered before everything went black.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: This chapter was actually the very first idea that made me write this story in the first place-it was the first, and only, scene I had entirely planned out, and it didn't seem to come out the way I wanted it to. Though, regardless, I do hope that all of you reader's enjoy this update; this chapter took me a LONG time to write because I wanted to get it perfect. I fear I may have pushed things a long too far, but, when I post the next chapter things seem to get pushed back once again. Anyway, I hope you all like this chapter and REVIEW tons; because they make me so inexplicably happy. So, as always, review if you'd like ;)**


	5. Chapter Five

**Chapter Five  
><strong>_"What I want from us is empty our minds;  
>We fake, we fuss, and fracture the times"<em>

* * *

><p>The firm hand that held her's securely—as if it were the only thing in the world she needed to survive—became limp within Emma's fingers and her posture tensed considerably, as if all hope had vanished from inside of her. Suddenly, Regina's body came crashing against the blonde's heavily, knocking the breath she had been holding from her lungs. As the woman tumbled lifelessly against her, Emma began to grow worried as she bit at her bottom lip frantically. But before her panic could take its mighty hold over her, the high pitched screech of tires once again pounded inside her ears and the blonde scrunched up her face in fear. Digging her blunt nails against the soft polyester beneath her fingers, Emma hissed as she felt a hot gust of wind whip across her face. Bracing herself, the blonde sucked in a deep breath and let her head fall against Regina's shoulder, burying her face in the thick, apple scented locks.<p>

Just as a sense of comfort washed over her, it was immediately snatched away as the truck's bumper collided against her shoulder. Seething with pain, the blonde barely noticed that, aside from the rough brush up, the vehicle had stopped moving. Silence cloaked itself around Emma and she shivered visibly—silence was never good. After several seconds the blonde still hadn't budged and she was nervous of what she would, or wouldn't, see if she were to open her eyes. For a fleeting second she pondered if she were dead; that the truck had rammed against her full force and her body didn't survive the impact. But, as she let the morbid thought quiet beneath the beating of her heart, Emma slowly opened a single green eye nervously. Noticing the familiar surroundings she let her other eye slip open and she nearly cheered for joy that she was, in fact, still alive. Smiling brightly, the blonde's happiness quickly evaded her as her gaze fell to her lap and she noticed the mayor's unconscious body wrapped around her's. Emma's heart sputtered in her chest at the realization that something seriously wrong could have happened to the brunette.

Shaking the woman in her arms gently, the blonde breathed Regina's name over and over silently, the way her tongue wound around the word comforted Emma. Slowly, the body began to move, and a soft groan fell from her full lips. Sighing with relief, Emma pulled back and looked down at Regina, awaiting the moment when her gaze met dark brown eyes. Eventually, the mayor's eyes fluttered open and a look of disorientation and confusion washed across her beautiful face. As a cool hand brushed against her cheek she shivered and let her gaze flicker up at the woman who had touched her so gently. Realizing it was Emma who held her so tightly, and so protectively, it made a small, tired smile tug at her mouth. But, their quiet moment of adoration was cut short as the sound of a car door made them both jump.

"Oh, Jesus…" Michael cursed, rounding his truck quickly, "damn it, I didn't even see you two. Jeez, I'm so sorry."

Hearing the familiarity in the voice that apologized behind them, Emma cocked her head to the side and smirked as the tall, bulky man came into view. Michael. The man she had not so long ago reunited with his children and a well of warmth swelled in her stomach at the thought of finally doing something right. Taking the iniative she gave a curt nod of the head, signaling that his apology was easily accepted. But, before she could turn back to the woman that had fallen in her arms, the brunette—who had seemed so serene and weak only moments before—frantically pulled herself out of the blonde's grasp. Before she could stop her, Regina was standing and striding over toward the worried man. Green eyes widened as Emma watched the mayor grab Michael by the collar of his blue jumpsuit and roughly pushed him against the hood of his red tow-truck. As the scene played out before her, the blonde scrambled to her feet to approach the enraged brunette.

"If she has so much as a mark on her…" Regina seethed, tightening her hold on the smooth material, "…I _will_ destroy you."

"Regina—" Emma started, reaching a hand forward and gently brushing her fingers against the brunette's arm.

Warmth seeped though the thin coat but the blonde's pleas were cut short as the mayor jerked away from the touch. "Stay out of this, Ms. Swan!"

For a minute, Emma felt hurt, her lips contorted into a frown as her heart beat thundered within her chest. But the realization hit her before tears could even be considered: Regina and the blonde weren't together, they weren't even friends. Seemingly remembering her relationship with the brunette, Emma squared her shoulders, gritted her teeth and walked away from the woman. Reaching Henry, she placed a comforting hand on his shoulder and squeezed it tightly; tears twinkled in his eyes when he turned to look at the blonde, and he pulled her into a frantic hug. Smiling as she felt his small arms encircle her waist, Emma flicked her gaze back over to Regina, who was in the process of threatening the pleading man.

"Madame Mayor, I—"

"No!" the brunette interrupted loudly, pushing him harder against the hood for emphasis and her brown eyes reveled with the terrified expression on his face. "You don't get to speak after what you've done. You could have killed her—"

"No, _you_ could have killed her!" Henry yelled from the sidewalk, pulling away from the blonde as a look of horror caressed his youthful features.

At the sound of her son's terrified voice, the mayor faltered and her head whipped to the side, her dark eyes meeting Henry's. His small face was masked in disgust and hatred, and it made Regina's hands quiver as they fell away from Michael's collar. Choking on the breath she had been holding, the brunette straightened herself as she walked over to her son; he was distraught and he needed to be comforted. Quickening her step, the mayor tentatively reached out a hand, trying to caress Henry's cheek but he stumbled backward to escape her touch. The action made Regina's heart stop and she felt tears prickle behind her eyes: her son hated her; there was no need to question it any longer. She was a monster in his eyes, and now, more than ever, the brunette wished that she had simply cursed herself, instead of everyone else in Storybrooke.

"Henry…" the mayor pleaded, trying to reach out again, but she jerked her hand away as he glared at her with hot, fiery eyes.

"Don't touch me!" Henry nearly screamed, as he stumbled back further and began running down the sidewalk in an attempt to flee his mother's presence. "I hate you!"

The three words shot through Regina's heart like a bullet, and her knees shuddered as if she were going to fall down from the shock. Her son had always been cold to the mayor ever since he got his hands on that damned storybook, but he had never told his mother that he hated her before, until that moment. Taking a shaking breath, the brunette let tears well up in her eyes as she started forward in an attempt to chase after her son. Though, she didn't make it far before Emma grabbed her by the arm and pulled her backwards. Regina growled deeply within her chest as she tried to free herself from the tight hold that the blonde had her in. Eventually the mayor pulled away from Emma's grip and she seethed at the blonde, tears falling onto her cheeks as her glare burned into Emma's skin.

"Don't." The blonde warned the brunette, her voice thick and heated with anger. "You've done enough, Regina."

"You don't make the decisions," Regina ground out between barred teeth, "_I'm_ his mother."

"I'm his mother too." Emma said in a clipped tone, and she watched the fire consume the mayor's black eyes as the brunette lifted her arm as if she was going to smack the blonde. Reaching up quickly, she grabbed Regina's wrist and dug her fingernails into the skin. "Don't try that again—now stay here and shut up while I clear out the crowd. I'll help you look for Henry afterward."

"Fuck you…" the mayor seethed under her breath as Emma walked away.

The pain and anger that swelled inside of the brunette's stomach made the urge to leave all the greater, but a small part buried deeply underneath the darkness forced her to stay. Clearing her throat, Regina turned around and shot Michael a glare as he finally pulled himself away from the hood of his car; she still had the undeniable ache to walk over and punch him square in the jaw. But that was when the mayor realized why she had threatened him to begin with: Emma. He had nearly killed the blonde, and the brunette's initial reaction to someone hurting Emma was to cause them pain in turn. Knitting her brows together as she rested against the side of her Mercedes, Regina bit at her lip in contemplation, and her eyes widened further as the incredible notion bounced around her mind loudly. She loved her; she was in love with Emma.

Lifting a hand, the mayor squeezed the bridge of her nose between her thumb and forefinger as she tried to push the thought away from her mind. There was no possible way that she had let her heart run away from her; had let it open itself up enough to let someone within the impenetrable depths. Love was weakness, that was what she was taught, how she was raised, and yet as the brunette slowly lifted her gaze to Emma, who was talking with the crowd outside of Granny's, Regina felt her chest twitch as her heart skipped a beat. The betraying muscle spoke the truth; it whispered all the soft, tender words that the mayor, herself, would never have the strength to say. Her heart was weak, and stupid, and the brunette needed to deal with it—needed to harden it so that the blonde couldn't claim it any further.

Taking a deep, shaking breath, Regina let her head fell backward, as her dark eyes looked up to the sky. Blinking back tears that she wished she could release, the mayor dug her fingernails into the palms of her hands and growled silently; it echoed hollowly within her chest, as if trying to frighten the humming muscle out of its feeble attempts at finding solace—finding love. But the seed was already been planted, Emma had touched her with a kindness and a tenderness that the brunette hadn't been in the company of for decades. The blonde was the only person that had seen the frightened, vulnerable side of the brunette, and Regina couldn't believe that she had let herself become so moronic and careless to have let the mask fall away. All of these thoughts wrestled within the mayor's mind as she tried to fight off the emotions that she was seemingly drowning in, but nothing she did, no matter how hard she pushed, they would never stop plaguing her. No, not until Emma was completely void of her life.

Feeling moisture against her cheek, the brunette snapped her eyes open and touched the drop of water that trailed down her face. Noticing that it wasn't a tear, Regina merely brushed it away as she saw the clouds grow darker under her gaze—rain was coming, and it was going to be quite a storm. Sighing in relief that her hard shell hadn't been broken completely, the mayor turned her eyes back to the street. The red truck and all of the people had vanished, thankfully, but the brunette's main problem was walking towards her, and Regina wasn't sure how she would react to the blonde; all of her actions for the past couple of days had surprised the mayor, and she was sure that the shock wasn't about to end.

"It's strange to see you actually following orders." Emma said dryly as she reached the brunette's sad, her green eyes rolling in jest; she was trying to make amends in her own stubborn way. "Shocking, almost."

"Don't worry, Ms. Swan," Regina started, as she pushed herself away from her car and straightened her jacket, removing all of the creases, "I don't plan on making a habit out of it."

"Good to know." The blonde said evenly as she briskly walked over to the passenger side of the black Mercedes. The mayor quirked an eyebrow at her in question, and Emma rolled her eyes again before she looked up at the dark gray sky. "Come on, it's gonna rain soon and we have to find Henry before it starts."

"Are you not capable of using your own car, Ms. Swan?" The mayor spat as she waved her hand in the direction of the beat up, yellow beetle. She needed to get away from the blonde, not be locked in a small vehicle with her.

"Jesus Christ, Regina…" Emma ground out, glaring at the brunette as she slammed a hand against the car door, "does everything always have to be a fight with you? Our son is missing; working together is our best option. So swallow your hatred for me and get in the damn car!"

Dark eyes widened at the blonde's declaration: _their_ son. For a moment Regina was floored by the wonderful way it sounded coming from Emma's lips, but she ignored it and sneered instead. Regardless of how tangled her emotions were, what the mayor did know was that the blonde was right: Henry was lost and it would do them no good if they argued, it was best to work together and take action. Nodding, the brunette opened her door and slid into the driver's seat. Feeling the blonde clamor in beside her, the mayor held her breath as she put the key into the ignition and started the car. As the engine roared to life, she let herself move her gaze away from the street as they landed on the Emma's face. A strong jaw, defined cheeks, thin lips, and large green eyes created a beautiful masterpiece upon the blonde's countenance, and Regina found it hard to tear her eyes away from the beauty that nestled there. Finally pulling her view back to the road, the mayor began driving down the main street, absently squeezing the steering wheel between white knuckled fingers. The tension between the two women was enough to kill both of them; the anger, coupled with the hidden desire that thrummed within each of their bodies made it feel as if there was no air in the car. Surprisingly, though, after a few moments, Emma fidgeted within her seat noisily as she cracked through the tension with much needed conversation.

"I told Michael to look for him at the playground," the blonde said evenly, her green eyes boring into the brunette's face with a wealth of intensity, "so you and I can check around the forest…he might've got lost."

"Michael?" Regina asked skeptically as she neared a stop sign, but quickly slammed on the brakes as the name finally registered within her brain. "You mean the man that nearly killed you and got us both into this mess?"

"He's a good guy …" Emma promised wearily, leaning back into the seat as if the upholstery would comfort her ever changing emotions, "…and besides, _you_ are the one who got us into this. Henry ran off because of you."

The mayor's eyes narrowed as she glared at the woman beside her: the blonde was slumped against the seat with her eyes pressed shut. The sight seemed to stifle the brunette's torrent of anger and she snapped her head back to the street, her mouth closing as she maintained silence, but the scowl remained etched across her lips. As Regina placed her foot against the gas and resumed driving, Emma opened one of her eyes and looked over at the irritated woman and she felt her chest tighten; she couldn't remember wanting someone so deeply before, and it literally made her body ache with need. Trying to push away the uncomfortable feeling with thoughts of anger, the blonde realized it was a lost cause; her heart wanted what it wanted, and secretly it had always wanted the brunette. Sighing, Emma shifted in her seat again, and signaled for the mayor to pull over: it was time to begin the search for _their_ son.

XXXXX

They had been walking through the forest for at least an hour—both simultaneously yelling Henry's name through the trees, in hopes of him hearing—when it started to rain. It rushed down through the thick leaves in rough strokes, soaking both women instantly, but neither seemed to care as they continued to search frantically. As the rain pelted down upon them, the blonde grimaced as water fell into her eyes making them sting. Rubbing away the dull pain to no avail, Emma jogged beneath a large tree that seemed to keep out most of the rain. Catching her breath, the blonde watched as Regina waded through the muck and wet grass as she remained searching for the boy. So consumed by the thought of Henry being in trouble, the brunette never noticed Emma standing beneath the tree she was about to pass, which caught the mayor completely off guard when the blonde pulled her under the shelter of the leaves and branches. Gasping in shock, Regina lost her balance and collided against the other woman; their wet clothes pressing and sticking together. Sucking in a breath, Emma flicked her eyes down to meet the mayor's, and the blonde found herself stuck in a pool of glimmering darkness: those black eyes of the brunette's could easily devour Emma, and in that moment the blonde fully believed that she would allow it willingly.

"What are you doing?" Regina whispered, her voice seemingly lost due to her body being in such close proximity to the blonde's. "We're supposed to be looking for Henry."

"We could both use a minute out of the rain." Emma supplied, her voice unwavering but her heavy breaths portraying her lack of control.

As the rain crashed against the trees, and the wind bellowed and hollered throughout the forest, the two women continued to cling to one another, neither being able to move. Moments fluttered by like raindrops falling from the leaves: quickly and rapidly—at time being lost as the blonde and the mayor stared at each other. Eventually, the dull sound of a twig snapping in the distance made both women tumble into the present, and they both looked through the thick blanket of rain in search of the familiar form of Henry. But instead, a deer lazily flittered through the trees as a way of escaping the precipitation. Both women sighed in frustration, as they pulled away from each other.

The urgency was quickly creeping up on the brunette, and she felt the worry she had for her son twist around her veins tightly. Suddenly, without a thought, she sped away from the shelter of the tree and ran back out into the rain, tripping and wobbling in her stilettos. Regina's screams tore through the forest as she went; her tears mingling with the rain water that ran down her cheeks in cold strokes. Her heart was hammering in her chest so loudly that the mayor's ears seemed to ring with the persistent noise: the fear that overwhelmed her reflected the same frantic emotions that had exploded from her when Henry had run away from home in search of his birth mother; a fear that she had never experienced so forcefully in her life. But the terror that rushed through her body only seemed to make the brunette search more thoroughly, she was sure she would die if anything happened to her little boy—it was all her fault.

The muscles within Regina's legs begged for her to stop, but she ignored the pain that shot through her calves as sobs ripped through her chest. As she picked up her speed, the mayor felt a firm hand wrap around her wrist, stunting her pace, and the brunette spun around quickly. When she turned, Regina was face to face with the blonde; Emma's cheeks were pale from the cold, and her golden hair lay sopping upon her shoulders and face, and yet the mayor still found her incredibly beautiful. A breath stuck in the brunette's throat as the fingers crawled up her arm to sit on her shoulder, the palm squeezing it roughly. Blood shot green eyes stared into her own, and Regina found herself shivering as she limply tried to pull away from Emma's hold on her.

"_This_," the blonde yelled over the roar of the rain as she waved her hand in exasperation, "won't help find him. You could get hurt…we'd have better luck if we—"

"Shut up!" The mayor screamed as she finally gathered the strength to pull away from Emma's grasp. "I need to find him—I need to find my son!" Her black eyes grew wild then as she poked the blonde in the chest for emphasis. "Like you said this is _my_ fault, and _I_ need to find him!"

"Shit…Regina, I was just pissed off, I didn't mean it." Emma said, as she leaned forward, making the finger that had poked her falter until the mayor's palm pressed against her chest. "Let me take you home…I don't want anything bad to happen to you!"

"Why," the brunette asked, her voice was suddenly small and unsure then, "…why do you care what happens to me?"

As the question fell from Regina's lips, the blonde felt her heart stall within her breast, and she let her head bow as her eyes peered at the dirty tips of her boots. If it had been a couple of hours earlier, Emma would have spoke the full truth, she would have looked the mayor square in the eye and told her that she cared deeply for her, and that somewhere deep within her heart the blonde loved her. But not now, not after everything that had transpired between them—no, she couldn't trust that she wouldn't get blown off, or worse…hurt. Stricken speechless, and rendered motionless, Emma gulped down her fear and tried to decide on how she should answer the floundering question, but once her eyes met the curious black ones in front of her, the blonde realized that her mouth had gone dry and all coherent thought erased from her mind.

"Because I…" Emma's voice cracked then, and she grimaced. "I can't…Jesus, why is this so hard?"

"Just tell me!" Regina snapped, nearly screamed in frustration as she watched the blonde tumble and trip over her words. She needed to know or else her body would explode with pent up tension.

It was then, as the mayor demanded a response that Emma finally seemed to grasp the amount of courage to properly portray why she cared for the brunette. With her pulse pounding in her ears, and her head swimming with nervousness, the blonde surged forward and claimed Regina's lips with her own. Their bodies crashed together as Emma quickly invaded the mayor's mouth, her tongue rolling across a plump bottom lip before the brunette let her in. The rain beat down upon them as their fingers dug into wet material of leather and polyester; clinging to each other as if they couldn't fathom the notion of letting go. Their tongues dueled savagely, and Regina moaned loudly into the blonde's mouth; the feeling of kissing Emma completely sober seemed to cause more sensations then when she had accosted the blonde in her father's crypt the night before.

Tangling her fingers into the dark, wet strands of the mayor's hair, the blonde pulled the other woman deeper into her, and her body shuddered with the hot desire that instantly coiled within her stomach. Breaking away for only a moment, the brunette growled in frustration, nipping at Emma's lip roughly—trying to coax the blonde to lean back in for another taste. Smirking deviously, Emma licked her lips and brought her mouth towards Regina's, but just before she was able to press against the mayor her pocket began to vibrate and she scowled at the interruption. Rolling her green eyes, the blonde pulled the cell phone from her pocket and answered it with irritation.

"Sheriff Swan," Emma murmured into the phone absently as the brunette looked at her with annoyance, but the voice on the other end grabbed her attention instantly. As the person on the other line babbled on, the blonde gripped the phone tightly as she listened closely. After a couple of moments the conversation seemed to come to an end and she nodded sharply. "Alright, thank you."

"Who was it?" Regina asked dryly, narrowing her eyes as the rain dripped off her eyelashes.

"Michael." Emma said softly, grabbing a hold of the mayor's hand as she began leading them through the trees. "He found Henry at the playground. He's a little angry, but he's alright."

Nodding absently, the brunette was distracted by the wealth of warmth that raced through her veins; Henry had been found, and he was safe. A relieved sigh escaped her lungs, as Regina's lips twitched with the hint of a smile. But, as the trees thinned and the two women neared the end of the forest, the mayor felt something inside of tug roughly; something forceful and dark. Closing her eyes tightly as Emma dragged her onto the street, the brunette tried to swallow the unwarranted thoughts and words that pounded inside her head. As they continued to scream and claw within her brain, Regina was forced to stop walking; the abrupt halt made the blonde jerk backward in surprise. Stumbling a bit, Emma noticed the odd look poised on the brunette's face and she leaned closer, her mouth opening as if to speak, but as the dark eyes looked at her with a coldness that Emma had believed she would never see again, she flinched away from Regina. Seeing the blonde's reaction to her, the mayor pulled her hand away from the one that cupped her own and began walking, quickly, towards her car.

Standing, dumbfounded, on the side of the street, Emma watched as the brunette walked away and she felt her face grow pale as the blood in veins ran cold; something had changed between them in the woods, and yet once they emerged it seemed that Regina had reverted back to the same place she had been earlier. The notion tangled in the blonde's heart strings, tugging at them viciously, and Emma felt something explode inside of her. Before she could stop herself the rage took over, and the blonde stormed after the mayor. When she was only a step behind the brunette, the blonde reached out and spun the woman around to face her. Black, watery eyes looked up at her with an uncharacteristic softness, but within seconds they grew as cold and dark as ever.

"Why are you doing this?" Emma spat, her eyes searing into the other woman's as her fingernails dug deeper into arm beneather her fingers. "Why do you always run away when you're scared? You're pathetic!"

"I'm pathetic?" Regina countered, her lips curling in a scowl as she seethed at the blonde. "You waltz into a town where you do not belong and begin taking things that are not yours. You're a low life and a thief and you have the nerve to call _me_ pathetic?

"I wouldn't have to if you didn't fuck with peoples' emotions and then pretend like nothing happened!" Emma screamed, shaking the mayor for emphasis, hoping that she could show the brunette just how much she was hurting inside. "You and me…we kissed in there…that meant something to me." Her voice was cracking, but the blonde didn't seem to care as she spewed out every thought that entered her mind. "You manipulated me into believing that deep down you were a good person, but you're not—you're the same bitch I thought you were when I first came here."

The words were as sharp as blades, and each word pierced Regina's flesh as they fell freely from the other woman's lips. As the mental pain tore at the mayor's heart, she let her face grow colder and more sinister, but deep down she knew that everything Emma was saying was the truth. She was a coward, and everytime she felt something positive flutter inside of her, the brunette always had the inexplicable urge to crush it—to destroy it. As the blonde's words echoed within her ears, Regina steeled herself, trying with all of her might to keep her mask firmly in place. She was so stupid to believe that this time things would be different; surrounded by the trees, with Emma's arms wrapped around her and the vulnerability of her worry shining from her eyes, the mayor felt that, perhaps, she finally was allowing herself to love, to be loved. But once she had found out that Henry was safe, and they had left the sheltered haven of the forest, the feeling of the blonde's fingers wrapped around her own made the brunette disgusted with herself. No, it would never be different because Regina would never be different—she would always remain terrified of the weakness that love created; always be frightened that the person she gave her heart to would quickly be ripped from her.

"I'm a bitch because I have to protect the things I care about, Ms. Swan—something you will never understand." The mayor said gruffly as she thrust open the door to her car. A dull pang splintered through her heart as it was well aware that her next words would forever fracture their relationship—whatever sort of relationship it was that they had. "Now, I'm going home to _my_ son, and I'm warning you to stay away from him…and from me."

The threat hung in the air with a thickness that seemed to choke the blonde, and her eyes widened as she tried to keep a hold of the woman beneath her hand, but the brunette's force was too great. Watching, shell shocked, as Regina stepped away from her and slid into the driver's seat of the Mercedes, Emma opened her mouth to say something, to try and get the mayor to understand her frustration, but the car door slammed in her face. Letting a stilted breath fall from her lips, the blonde lunged toward the car and pounded her hand against the window, to which the brunette ignored as she turned the key in the ignition. Pleading loudly above the rain and the purring engine, Emma let her forehead rest against the window for a moment hoping that Regina would change her mind. But her mind was already set, and as she pressed the toe of her stiletto down hard on the gas, the mayor let a choked sob rip from her lungs as she peeled down the street. Looking in her rear view mirror, the brunette felt the hot tears pour from her eyes as she saw Emma standing numbly in the middle of the road being pelted by rain. It took all of Regina's strength not to pull the car over and to continue driving; the pain of letting the blonde go was killing her, but she knew that this was what she needed to do, or else face a greater loss than she had ever felt in her entire life: the complete and utter loss of control.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: First of all I want to apologize to everyone who has been following this story: it's literally been months since I've updated and I feel horrible. For some reason I just couldn't muster the inspiration for this story that I once could, and I felt the need to give you readers the best when it came to this piece. But, finally, after months and months I was suddenly struck with the inspiration to work on this, and I'm so glad that I finally have it finished, and by IT I mean this chapter. Don't worry, there are still plenty of chapters to go until the end; I have huge plans for this piece! It may be a bit rough, but I hope you all enjoy it nonetheless. And thanks for sticking by me during the hiatus, it means a lot. Anyway, as always, review if you'd like!**


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